Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Memo to coworkers

Dear co-worker -

It really isn't funny to constantly ask/tell the pregnant woman

"Are you still here" When obviously I am, you're looking at me and I must hear this 10 times a day
"When are you going to have that baby already" Yeah as if I know
"When's your last day" Again as if I know
"You look like you've dropped" When I dropped weeks ago
"Are you sure your not having twins?" Kiss my ass
"How much weight HAVE you gained" nunya biz
"Can't you take the rest of the time off?" Don't make me cry about how sucky maternity leave rules/pay are

7 comments:

N.D. said...

Can you make a big sign with the middle finger up and just wear that around?? poor thing!! almost !!

Audrey said...

Answers:
1. No, I'm the ghost of Christmas future.

2. Right now, you're standing in my water.

3. One day after yours.

4. My interest in this conversation? Yep.

5. Wanna stick your head in there and find out for me?

6. Oh just a smidge, I still weigh ___ (10 pounds less that this person looks unless you are obviously smaller, then state your pre-preggo weight and watch the reddening).

7. Yeah, but then I'd be seeing you that much sooner.

Clare said...

ha, i like nd's suggestion! i was a bitch to coworkers at the end...they quickly learned just to stay away from me.

Josh Middleton said...

The twins comment doubled me over!

Michelle Simmons said...

Ugh. The end is the worst! It'll all be better soon!!! :)

Angela said...

at 36 weeks I was told that I was 80% and 3cm...so Tim and I were ready to head to the hospital that night. I called my boss and told her, well she told my department. And one of the ladies decided to email the ENTIRE company with the update....

When I showed up at work the next day I had the guys from IT asking me if I had effaced any more...how embarrassing. apparently they were worried I wouldn't be there for the surprise shower they were going to throw.

Nitsirk said...

That was the worst! I was so ready to throttle the next person that asked "if I was ready to have the baby."